My, what a spectacularly selfish way to be unselfish
At Gavin Brown’s 4th birthday party, the usual detritus lined the edges of the backyard: sippy cups, sunscreen, water shoes, stuffed animals. There were 44 guests and as many buns on the grill, in addition to an elaborate ice cream cake adorned with a fire truck. For the adults, there was sangria and savory corn salsa.
Glenn Johnson lifted his daughter Mia, 3, up to drop money into the donation box.
But the only gift in sight was a little red Matchbox hook and ladder rig. All the bounty from Gavin’s birthday -- $240 in checks and cash collected in a red box next to a plastic fire helmet -- went to the Cranford Fire Department.
(--the NY Times)
The idea is good. Cut back on the more conspicuous consumption parts of a birthday party and give the money to a good cause. But. 44 guests? For a 4 year old's birthday party? And no presents?
"We're going to teach you to be unselfish by holding a BIG PARTY instead of giving you presents for your birthday. And that way WE get to enjoy the excess while you don't!"
Aaargh.
Witness, perhaps, the first hyper-parenting trend that does not reek of wanton excess.
(--the same NYTimes article)
Pfft. 44 people at a 4 year old's birthday party is wanton excess. It's not just that, it's mean wanton excess.
If you're going to be unselfish, hold a smaller party. Don't just redirect the (hypothetical) savings from presents over to food and drink for a big old barbeque. If you really really want to teach your child about how to act morally, let them help decide how you're going to distribute your yearly tithe. That way you're not just saying "we're taking YOUR presents, giving them to someone else, and having a nice adult party while we're doing it!", you're saying "we're sharing OUR money, and the sacrifice comes equally from all of us."
Children are naturally generous. They don't need to be forced. If your family has an open tradition of sharing, your children will learn to share without being prodded into it.
(-- via The Best)
Comments
It’s a party for a 4 year old. You might not have considered this when sending out the big pile of invitations, but small children are small children and don’t need to have 44 people around to have fun, even on their birthday.
I’m not sure why you feel it’s necessary to point out that it’s a vegetarian BBQ. Vegetarian is more healthy than meat, but it’s not cheap enough to excuse the excess.
Comments are closed
Since you were not at the party you have no clue what you are commenting on. Since there were 20 children there obviously would be parents attached to that number (44). It was definitely a “childs party”….the main focus is the children having lots of fun in the backyard while the parents can relax. And since this family is vegetarian it wasn’t the typical bbq…but really good food nontheless.